Hi, I’m Kaitlin… I don’t really know how this blog thing works, I’ve had it forever & I just re-blog pictures that make me laugh.. But I always see people venting to this site like it’s their own personal diary. But it’s not really a diary because people can see it? It’s like a book or something. But anyway, I’m going to be using this as a ‘diary’ now. I feel like it’s a good way to express my feelings. This already sounds dumb but I actually give no fucks right now. I would go to my friends about things, but it’s like now a days you CAN NOT TRUST ANYONE. My best friend moved away from me about a year ago, & there was no way to stop her.. I only see her about once every 3-4 months. & I can’t tell my best friend that lives here about anything because she has anxiety & depression & has cut her self multiple times. Anything & everything triggers it. Let’s see, I’m going to change her name.. her name is ‘Lindsey’. Well Lindsey’s been my friend since 7th grade.. I just recently found out this year that her dad has cancer, I’ve done everything I can for her. Yesterday she walked up to me & said.. Kaitlin, today is my dad’s last day for treatment & they think it’s gone but I’m so scared. I didn’t say a word, I just hugged her as tight as I could & all she could do was cry. & All I could do was fight back tears. It was like her life was some sad depressing reality tv show, & I was her therapist. So, anyway, that’s why I can’t tell her anything, because then she worries about me, & she has too much to worry about already. I’m not selfish, I would rather bottle up my feelings then tell somebody, & hurt them for my own stupid ass reasons. Or tell anyone I can’t trust. I’ve made that mistake PLENTY of times. This other girl that I thought was my ‘best friend’ back stabbed me.. but the silly thing was after all the shit she put me through I never told anybody that her boyfriend of 9 months got her pregnant & she got an abortion.. IN 7TH GRADE. That’s tough & I knew that was a sensitive topic for her so I never told a soul.. until now. I told her everything that happened in my life, from family issues, to heartbreak. But all of a sudden I come to school & everyone thinks they know my life story.. all I could do was not talk to her because I knew if I did, she would tell somebody. She hated me all of a sudden & I had no idea why. Now I know for a fact that a ‘best friend’ is just a label. Your ‘best friend’ can turn into your worst enemy in less than 24 hours. Today, I don’t come to her for anything, I try to avoid her as much as possible. It was the best thing I had ever done in my life. & now I’m pretty much drama free. (from girls anyway.) So, as I said before, this is now my serious blog. My challenge is I will try to post something almost everyday. & if you don’t like it, I highly recommend you take your happy ass to my blog, & hit the un-follow button. I am Kaitlin, & this is my Tumblr challenge.
just wait for it.
what the frick did I just watch.
(Source: fleshpound, via brooklynnebegins)
